Does a happy ex-wife lead to a happy life?
Apparently the old saying "happy wife, happy life" can extend to divorce.
Sound confusing? It turns out that in some cases, divorce can actually be better for the whole family. Researchers recently looked at the overall happiness of children after divorce. Essentially, researchers got together to answer the question: Does a divorce that results in happier parents lead to happier children?
How can you determine if children are happy? Researchers answered this question by looking at rates of divorce among children who had grown up in various family situations. Researchers compiled data stretching back to 1987 on children raised in families with low-conflict married parents, parents in a high-conflict marriage and parents who were once in a high-conflict marriage but subsequently became "happily divorced." The researchers then examined these children with their own marriages once grown.
It turns out that watching parents' divorce did not automatically set children up for divorce in their own lives. Instead, researchers found that children raised in families with parents who address conflict well fair best.
What does this mean? It means low-conflict families that stay together and families who were in a high-conflict marriage and divorce raise children who have the same odds of facing divorce themselves.
In fact, researchers stated that families with high conflict that remain married raise children that are the most likely to face divorce in the future.
While it is commonly thought of as better to "stay together for the children," that is not always the case. Sometimes, it is better for everyone to get out from a failing marriage, including children who are better off without the stress of parents engaged in high-conflict behaviors.